The righteous wife

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Re: Would you obey your hubby?

Wa Alaykum Assalaam,

The very article you quote froim in-facts supports what I am saying.

"Qanit means one who is devoted to someone and out of love and devotion obeys him or her. Outside of the present verse the word in its various forms, occurs seven times and is used of both men and women. In six out of these seven places, the object of devotion and obedience is understood to be God, in one place it is God and His Messenger..."

This makes it clear that the meaning of 'qanit' is with regards to Holy devotion - towards Allah.

The article is pointing out how the word has been used in various places to mean what you said it means, yes, but this does not mean it MUST mean that in every single place it has been used. The very next line of what you quoted reads: For this reason qanitat may simply mean "devoted to God". In view of the context, the idea of devotion and obedience to the husband may also be read into the word.

I am fully open to the possibility that it refers to obedience to Allaah, just as it could be referring to the husband as has been established by evidence.

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Since the discussion of this topic has taken place in three threads, I have moved some posts into the one in which it first started.
Looking through this thread, I have noticed that certain people call ahadeeth "hearsay" and disregard them as though nothing from what Muhammad :arabic5: taught us has been delivered to us. When examining hadeeth, we rely upon people devoting their entire lives to researching and classifying hadeeth into trustworthy and untrustworthy sources; in fact, there is a whole science of hadeeth in Islam and if we are to study our religion in the correct manner, we must take from both the Qur'an and the Sunnah. This is something which both of them command.

Regarding the topic at hand; I hope to make it clear that nobody is saying that a woman must obey her husband in the same way that she obeys Allaah. She has rights over her husband, and he has rights over her. If we are to discuss these in detail then I think we must first come to terms with our sources. If there are people who do not accept from hadeeth, then we need to focus on this issue first before moving on to other topics.

For a discussion on the position of the Sunnah in Islam, you can continue in the following threads:

http://www.islamicboard.com/depth-islam/8795-what-true-shahaada.html
http://www.islamicboard.com/basics-islam/8370-just-quran-quran-hadith.html

For those wanting to know about the rights of the wife and husband, then we already have quite a few articles on the forum discussing both of these - a simple search should find you them Insha'Allaah.

:w:
 
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:sl:

I seek refuge in GOD, from Satan the rejected

In the name of GOD, Most Gracious and Most Merciful


Do Not Marry Idol Worshipers.

[2:221]. Do not marry idolatresses unless they believe; a believing woman is better than an idolatress, even if you like her. Nor shall you give your daughters in marriage to idolatrous men, unless they believe. A believing man .is better than an idolater, even if you like him. These invite to Hell, while GOD invites to Paradise and forgiveness, as He wills. He clarifies His revelations for the people, that they may take heed.


[4:21]. How could you take it back, after you have been intimate with each other, and they had taken from you a solemn pledge?


Respect for the Father.

[4:22]. Do not marry the women who were previously married to your fathers - existing marriages are exempted and shall not be broken - for it is a gross offense, and an abominable act. .


Incest Forbidden.

[4:23]. Prohibited for you (in marriage) are your mothers, your daughters, your sisters, the sisters of your fathers, the sisters of your mothers, the daughters of your brother, the daughters of your sister, your nursing mothers, the girls who nursed from the same woman as you, the mothers of your wives, the daughters of your wives with whom you .have consummated the marriage - if the marriage has not .been consummated, you may marry the daughter. Also prohibited for you are the women who were married to your genetic sons. Also, you shall not be married to two sisters at the same time - but do not break up existing marriages. GOD is Forgiver, Most Merciful. .


Mutual Attraction And Dowry Required.

[4:24*]. Also prohibited are the women who are already married, unless they flee their disbelieving husbands who are at war with you.* These are GOD's commandments to you. All other categories are permitted for you in marriage, so long as you pay them their due dowries. You shall maintain your morality, by not committing adultery. Thus, whoever you like among them, you shall pay them the dowry decreed for them. You commit no error by mutually agreeing to any adjustments to the dowry. GOD is Omniscient, Most Wise. .

*4:24 If believing women flee their disbelieving husbands who are at war with the believers, they do not have to obtain a divorce before remarriage. See 60:10.


[4:25]. Those among you who cannot afford to marry free believing women, may marry believing slave women. GOD knows best about your belief, and you are equal to one another, as far as belief is concerned. You shall obtain permission from their guardians before you marry them, and pay them their due dowry equitably. They shall maintain moral behavior, by not committing adultery, or having secret lovers. Once they are freed through marriage, if they .commit adultery, their punishment shall be half of that .for the free women.* Marrying a slave shall be a last .resort for those unable to wait. To be patient is better for you. GOD is Forgiver, Most Merciful. .

Insh'allah!

:w:

Fatima :sister:
 
Oh ! Had I a righteous wife who would accept me as I am instead of continuously attempting to mould me as she dreamed her would-be husband to be !!
 
n the context of the family, the husband is the leader (Qawwam) of the family as defined by Allah (Quran 4:34).

However, the power of this leader, like that of all other Islamic leaders, is bound on the one hand by the Quran and Sunnah, and on the other by Shura or mutual consultation - amruhum shura bainahum (Quran 42:38).

The Muslim family, therefore, like all other Muslim institutions, formal or informal, must be run with mutual consultation.
 
May Allah guide these women, If my husband was to say im bringing home a new wife id inshaa allah welcome her with open arms , someone to help with the house work
 
May Allah guide these women, If my husband was to say im bringing home a new wife id inshaa allah welcome her with open arms , someone to help with the house work

:sl:
I think that waging a war by an existing wife against her husband to prevent him from having a second wife (out of jealousy only) is tantamount to waging a war against God's ordainment. Such a woman as well as the people in general who invent shame in having more than one wife are likely to fall in the category of 'Kafirs', ' Fasiqs' and 'Zalims' as per the verses 44. 45 and 47 of Surah Al- Mayeda.
 
Mashallah , Really a great piece of information. May allah bless us so that we all can pass the knowledge to every single muslim in this world.
 
that was very useful info sis! mash'allah. fanks 4 sharin it

we need an article on th righteous husband too. caus certain peopl av taken it in th wrong way, if u know wat i mean. an we kinda need 2 sit um down and remind em of ther rights as a wife. and giv em a pat on ther back....know wat i mean?


Asalaam alykumw arahamtullahi wabarakatuh sis
I have posted some articles sometime back please check it inshAllaah
 
:sl:
BOTH HUSBAND N WIFE HAVE RIGHTS over each other, this saying is wrong that islam tells woman not to demand for her rights n just keep fulfiling the righs of her husband, as far as I know husband has no right over her wifes income or wealth she can spend lawfully as she pleases, it upto her whethr shes wants to contributing toward household finances, financial provision is fard on husbands not wives. a wife has the right to demand for the same liestyle shes had at her parents house n cooking is not a frad infact if she had a cook in her house before she got married than she has the right to demand from her husband. its a different matter that a wife is willing to compromise a little to get more reward for her patience INSHALLAh.

u shud luk into how Mohammed (peace be uopn him) used to treat his wives, even though he had so many wives he still liked doing things with his own hands and at times helped his wives too. its not forbidden for husband to help thier wives in household duties, he never used to complain about the way his wives cuked the food and never shouted at them liked men do these days.

ALLAh has given rights to both genders, but unfortunately these days more emphasis is given on the rights of husbands than on the rights of wives. There are a few articles for any iternested to read!!!

http://www.islamweb.net/ver2/archive/article.php?lang=E&id=40156

http://www.islamweb.net/ver2/archive/article.php?lang=E&id=37358

http://www.islamweb.net/ver2/archive/article.php?lang=E&id=29663
 
I know who is a righteous wife the thing is there aren't any these days.Muslim shave become corrupt.
:sl:
Brother it is not for you to judge and make statements like these, of course there are problems in the ummah so there are not as many righteous women as in previous times but there are many. The same can be said for the amount of practising brothers around.
:w:
 
:sl:
Brother it is not for you to judge and make statements like these, of course there are problems in the ummah so there are not as many righteous women as in previous times but there are many. The same can be said for the amount of practising brothers around.
:w:


definately the same goes for the brothers.
Sisters have as much difficulties (if not more) when it comes to finding a righteous brother. I can say that for myself!
 
Assalamu alaikum,

I have only read a few comments, and decided i dont want to read anymore.

Subhanallah, its no wonder the ummah is in the state it is in..may Allah guide us all on the truth..ameen.

The man in Islam is the maintainer of women. He has to feed her, clothe her, and the list goes on...but he also has his rights....

A hadeeth did come to mind.....(sahih)...If Allah would order any of His creation to bow to other than Him, it would be the woman to her husband....can someone pls find the hadeeth, as my wording is not 100%, but basically this is what it means.

And you say that it is not obligatory to obey the husband, and serve him?
When he works hard all day???...to provide for you, and your children?

I thought this hadeeth would be more than enough to convince anyone.

Another hadeeth....when your husband is pleased with you, Allah is pleased with you....

I would appreciate if anyone can find these hadeeth, and post them.

There are numerous hadeeth on this topic, but we lack knowledge, thats all.

I am a little disappointed in the way some people speak...it almost sounds as though they are arguing against Islam.

Allah has ordered rights for everyone...this is what makes Islam so beautiful.
 

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