Coping with Depression, stress and anger

  • Thread starter Thread starter Z
  • Start date Start date
  • Replies Replies 548
  • Views Views 61K
Re: Im so depressed :(

dream walker said:
what is an ahmedi if its diffrent from kifir? i have not heard the word b-4?

ohhh sister, i am haveing deep men problems at the moment as well.........:laugh: i am trying to tell myself men are like trees- every where you look you see one.............well some have thorns.......or are rotten...or dead lol, or cant grow in your habitat..........ummm ok its just a saying to help out .....uhh its not really helping me much at the moment as well but we must stay strong.........things will end one way or another..........then we can move on..........*oh allah, give us strength.................
Click to expand...

The main reason i can't rest is because of the way it ended.
If he was to call me again (which he never will), it would make me so so happy. If he called me to say he wants me back, that would make me double happy, BUT I would NEVER take him back. Just knowing the fact that he still wants me and that I have no interest in him, would make me happily move on and get on with my life.

I'd finally have peace in my heart. But at this present moment, because the split was so bitter, it left me with so many questions hanging over my head. I never wanted him to hate me and I still don't, I didn't want it to end the way it did. So for him to call me again would make me so happy and I'd be very peaceful.

I know most of you won't believe me, but I can honestly say, I would not take him back. It's just the way it ended, that's why I can't rest, I have no peace. It wouldn't have hit me so bad if the split weren't so bitter. So YES i'd be very happy if he called, but NO I wouldn't take him back. I just want a peaceful closure :(
 
Re: Im so depressed :(

The main reason i can't rest is because of the way it ended.
If he was to call me again (which he never will), it would make me so so happy. If he called me to say he wants me back, that would make me double happy, BUT I would NEVER take him back. Just knowing the fact that he still wants me and that I have no interest in him, would make me happily move on and get on with my life.
Click to expand...

That is a very normal feeling. It is normal to fear rejection. The feeling you seem to want to achieve is to know that you have not been rejected. You have no control over how another person feels. The hardest lesson in life is when we discover that not everybody loves us unconditionally. It is very painful to learn that there is a possibility that even one person has stopped loving us.

But the reality is that the only person whose feelings we have any control over, is ourself.

I'd finally have peace in my heart. But at this present moment, because the split was so bitter, it left me with so many questions hanging over my head. I never wanted him to hate me and I still don't, I didn't want it to end the way it did. So for him to call me again would make me so happy and I'd be very peaceful.
Click to expand...

That would give you instant gratification and would give you a temporary feeling of warmth. But, what about the long term effects? What happens if later in life you become lonely and you happen to come across him again? This can open up the doors to more problems and a greater pain than you now feel.

The past when gone, is gone. It is often a mistake to try to go back and change the past. thinking too strongly of our past errors can keep us from moving forward in life.

Also, it is necessary to understand that he has feelings also. This was as difficult on him as it was on you. You do not want to have him re-experience the pain anymore than you want to re-experience it. He is handling things in his own way to make his life return to normal. Do not wish for him to have to go through every thing all over. Allow him time to let his wounds heal and heal in the manner that is best for him.

Concentrate only on healing your own wounds. Ask Allah(swt) to give you the strength to see that you have your own set of pains and ask Allah(swt) to give you the knowledge and strength to let you understand and free you from this pain you are imposing upon your self.

I know most of you won't believe me, but I can honestly say, I would not take him back. It's just the way it ended, that's why I can't rest, I have no peace. It wouldn't have hit me so bad if the split weren't so bitter. So YES i'd be very happy if he called, but NO I wouldn't take him back. I just want a peaceful closure :(
Click to expand...

As an outsider and not connected with your life. From what I see is you do have the tools for proper closure. Closure is not always a gentle drawing of the curtains. Sometimes closure comes as a violent slamming of the door.

The closure comes when we can see that the door is closed and we have no need to reopen it.

Do not think in terms as to what will feel best at this moment, think in terms of what is best for the future.

Bro. Muhammad gave you excellent advice on how to make Dua. Follow that advice and ask for the strength to understand that as things are, it is the best closure possible. Also in your Dua ask for the ability to let go of the past and free your thoughts so you may grow to the Beautiful future Allah(SWT) has for you if you will follow his path and not try to make your own path.
 
i'm going mad...help

the other day i got up and didnt get ready for school straightaway as i normally do, which is weird.
i got up and instead of making breakfast i went to my room and started looking in all my jewellry boxes and my cupboard and draws and i was looking for two of my neclaces; one said 'best friend' on it and the other said 'daughter'. i was getting late for school but i didnt care. it was like an obsession, as if something bad was going to happen if i didnt find them and wear them. eventually i found them and they were both tangled together so i got a pair of scissors and cut the chains off and put the pendants on my other neclace that i always wear. as soon as i put them on i felt re-assured, as if i really was a best friend and daughter. i dont know why. i dont normally do things like that.
when i eventually got into school, one of my mates told me that she had a dream about me at night; i rang her and i was panicing and telling her that i had to go to her house and she was saying to me no dont come but i was saying that i had to go and was pleading with her. i was saying 'i need to get out. i need to go to your house'

i think that both the 'incident' and the dream are connected somehow but i dont know how

brothers and sisters, what does this mean? any ideas? am i going mad?
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

salamualikum
lol tis funny but anywho am no scholar but what i can say is ''you love her && she loves you'' :D
best mates forever so don't mess :p
ma'assalama
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

Anonymous Tester said:
the other day i got up and didnt get ready for school straightaway as i normally do, which is weird.
i got up and instead of making breakfast i went to my room and started looking in all my jewellry boxes and my cupboard and draws and i was looking for two of my neclaces; one said 'best friend' on it and the other said 'daughter'. i was getting late for school but i didnt care. it was like an obsession, as if something bad was going to happen if i didnt find them and wear them. eventually i found them and they were both tangled together so i got a pair of scissors and cut the chains off and put the pendants on my other neclace that i always wear. as soon as i put them on i felt re-assured, as if i really was a best friend and daughter. i dont know why. i dont normally do things like that.
when i eventually got into school, one of my mates told me that she had a dream about me at night; i rang her and i was panicing and telling her that i had to go to her house and she was saying to me no dont come but i was saying that i had to go and was pleading with her. i was saying 'i need to get out. i need to go to your house'

i think that both the 'incident' and the dream are connected somehow but i dont know how

brothers and sisters, what does this mean? any ideas? am i going mad?
Click to expand...
Which is the dream and which is the incident?

You probably aren't mad.
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

Anonymous Tester said:
the other day i got up and didnt get ready for school straightaway as i normally do, which is weird.
i got up and instead of making breakfast i went to my room and started looking in all my jewellry boxes and my cupboard and draws and i was looking for two of my neclaces; one said 'best friend' on it and the other said 'daughter'. i was getting late for school but i didnt care. it was like an obsession, as if something bad was going to happen if i didnt find them and wear them. eventually i found them and they were both tangled together so i got a pair of scissors and cut the chains off and put the pendants on my other neclace that i always wear. as soon as i put them on i felt re-assured, as if i really was a best friend and daughter. i dont know why. i dont normally do things like that.
when i eventually got into school, one of my mates told me that she had a dream about me at night; i rang her and i was panicing and telling her that i had to go to her house and she was saying to me no dont come but i was saying that i had to go and was pleading with her. i was saying 'i need to get out. i need to go to your house'

i think that both the 'incident' and the dream are connected somehow but i dont know how

brothers and sisters, what does this mean? any ideas? am i going mad?
Click to expand...

strider, the black is the incident and the red is the dream
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

sister please relax. Even a person who has had a severe episode of epilepsy with myoclonic jerks, isn't labeled an epileptic if it were just a one time deal.... you are allowed one free psychotic episode-- like a bank credit or a get out of jail free card from Monopoly after you've paid your fifty dollar fine.... consider payment tendered! & just resume life as you know it without dwelling too much on the what is considered "normal"
wassalaam
 
Re: i'm going mad...help




I seek refuge in Allah (The One God) from the Satan (devil) the cursed, the rejected

With the name of ALLAH (swt) -The Bestower Of Unlimited Mercy, The Continously Merciful


Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh (May the peace, mercy and blessings of Allah be upon you)

&&


Anonymous Tester said:
.... am i going mad?
Click to expand...


----Insha Allah , no.

Don't miss ur any prayer ; before sleeping at night read Sura Falak , Sura Nas minimum 3 times . Anybody fears that someone is trying to harm , s/he should ask help of Allah .

U may read the the following link

Black Magic: Rulings & Remedy

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/...h-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503543818

 
Re: i'm going mad...help

No, you're not going mad. But the shaytaan is trying to make you superstitious. Nothing bad can happen unless Allah wills, so a piece of jewellery isn't going to prevent it.

InshaAllah recite ayatul kursi after salah

subhanAllah 33x

alhumdulillah 33x

Allahu Akbar 33x

Kalimah Tawheed 1x

InshaAllah, Allah will protect and help you in your religious and wordly affairs. Give sadka in the name of Allah to ward of evil.
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

jazak'allah for all the replies

i'm not dwelling on it, i just wanted to know what it meant and what others thought of it, and now that i look at it, the title of the thread was a bit stupid :-[

i've got over it, but am just thinking about what happeded, thinking about why it happened.

:w:
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

lol ok, just put it down to 'one of them things' inshaAllah
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

i don't think your going mad...it may just have been a coincident...
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

i suggest you see a psychiatrist :p

na on a serious note :D

i think you may be feelin insecure about yourself, like you may not feel that you are a best friend or the person you think of as a best friend thinks of you as a best friend :D ya get me?

when your insecure just ask the person or summin and this should clear stuff, but dont be insecure cos im sure if you treat and think of someone as a best friend they will do the same to you :D:D
 
Re: i'm going mad...help

chacha_jalebi said:
i suggest you see a psychiatrist :p

na on a serious note :D

i think you may be feelin insecure about yourself, like you may not feel that you are a best friend or the person you think of as a best friend thinks of you as a best friend :D ya get me?

when your insecure just ask the person or summin and this should clear stuff, but dont be insecure cos im sure if you treat and think of someone as a best friend they will do the same to you :D:D
Click to expand...

i'm over it now, but i thought i ought to reply to you because you took the time to do so.

i dont think i was feeling insecure about my best friend coz i luv her ta bits an i know she feels da same lol :D, but its weird...she know all about what happened, i tell her everything so she knows (my mums always yelling cuz i'm ALWAYS on the phone to her even though we're togetha 6hrs a day, esspecially at night...dnt get the perfect nights sleep without talkin to her first lol) but i dnt know...mayb it was jsut one of those days...i guess i'll never know why it happened. maybe its just stress.
 
very depressed..

right now i feel very depressed. my life is taking a dramatic turn. everything has gone wrong and it just seems to get worst within time. i want to become more religious and there are things that are preventing that. (dont wanna talk about it) i feel as if im losing my faith and it hurts me everyday. my depression has me crying as a i pray. i ask allah to help me and i dedicate everyday to him and for some reason i dont feel it in my heart anymore. i have done harram things and i feel as if allah would never forgive me. my depression has taken over me and its effecting my religion. please brothers and sisters, , i need some guidness
 
Re: very depressed..

dont worry, dont be too hard on yourself, allah is not called 'the most forgiving' for no reason.
 
 
Last edited:
Re: very depressed..

Subhanallah muslims arent supposed to be depressed.

Anyway i know where u coming from and how its like, just keep struggling fighting the nafs. Inshallah it will totally be worth it, the reward you'll get in the hereafter.
 

Similar Threads

Back
Top