I remember about a hadith i believe that Rasullah(saws) has said(I assume you guys also are aware of that one), i judge based on what i know or what you present to me. In this case this, sister tells us 50% and based on this 50% makes it for us 100% and judgement is based on that. The other half now suddenly comes above water and i think also many other sisters here who were advising her, now also have changed their advice somehow. We all agree about the whole secrecy as a no-go and also touching her before marriage is a no-go. The rest is clear.
Yes, and that refers to facts. Based on the information given, a person will make a judgement decision. He will not assume things or insinuate or accuse the person, thereby, reading too much into it without any information or basis. The decision should be made based on the information on the table.
The taking on of a husbands surname is a misogynistic practice.
You do have to question why he hasn't married her legally, it is quite suspicious imo. She deserves to have her rights as a legal wife in that land.
No, you do not. That is something he and his first wife needs to discuss or may have discussed. Seems like she is getting more of her rights then the civil law of the land would give her. Why have you been accusatory on this brother from the get go? Is it the misandry of feminism or grudges of personal experience?
السلام عليكم
Brother Aaj
I think both the men & women on this forum have done a fantastic job of trying to clarify my point.
If you still don't understand my logic regarding loopholes & abusing the Islamic law. Then please do let me know if you need me to elaborate further?
:wasalam:
I"m sure they have done a fantastic job, on some other thread. This is the first time I've come across such a statement. Thus the inquiry to elaboration of your statement.
I am still wondering this thing: as it is allowed via Islamic law to marry more than one wife but at the same time, as it is said that Muslim is obligated to follow the law of the land as long as it does not conflict with Islamic law. Now, Islamic law doesn´t say that a man have to marry more than one wife but it is his right if he wants to. As polygamy isn´t obligatory way to practice Islam, what is the common interpretation in this kind of case? Should Muslim man follow the law of the land or broke it with cases where it is not obligatory to do so. If law forbids Muslim to pray he has to broke the law and follow Islam as praying is obligatory act but what about cases where doing something is not obligatory in Islam?
With regard to the Muslim man who has a second wife, I believe—and Almighty Allah knows best—that he has to follow the channels of law in order to legalize his second marriage in the country he lives in. There are some Muslim brothers who did so through the legitimate channels. They submitted documents to the European countries they reside in to the effect that they have second wives according to the Islamic Law and that the first wives agree to that; they also asserted that they would not give a privilege to one of the wives at the expense of the other. I know a Jordanian Muslim who managed to get residence for his two wives in a European country.
If the attempts to legalize the second marriage fail, the person could document his (second) marriage in one of the Islamic centers, yet, his marriage then would not be regarded legitimate under the law of the country concerned. The problem he might face in the future is regarding getting birth certificates for the children from his second wife. But I think there are some flexible European laws concerning registering names of the children born even from illegitimate relationships.
I advise the Muslims who live in the Western countries to demand their rights in that regard. Foreign non-Muslim minorities who live in the West managed to get approval to exercise their rights pursuant to their religious rituals, such as rights concerning slaughtering animals and burying their dead. Muslims can follow in the same footsteps to get legitimate approvals from the Western countries to exercise the rituals of their religion freely.
- Sheikh Ahmad Hulail, imam of Tariq ibn Ziad Mosque in Frankfort, Germany
http://www.islamawareness.net/Polygamy/fatwa001.html
Muslims living in non-Muslim countries have to comply with laws and regulations of the country they have been entrusted though valid visas to enter. At the same time, they have to avoid whatever contradicts Islamic teachings. In case they are obliged by law to uphold something contrary to Islamic teachings, they have to adhere to the minimum that the law requires of them.
https://en.islamtoday.net/node/604
According to the above text, the minimum requirement of the law is that a man can register only one woman as his wife in the civil law. He can Islamically register his other wives in the Islamic center. If the kuffars want to make it hard and say it's illegal to have polygamy then he can say by their laws he is legally married to one person, so what's the problem?
There are also places that allow polygamy in the west, there are several states in the US that allow polygamy. Also, Jews are allowed to practice their religious laws in civil matters in these western lands and indicated above, Muslims should also demand for these same rights. It seems hypocritical taht the westerners can do whatever they want in Muslim lands, yet they have a problem with Muslims not "integrating" in their haram lifestyle.
Multiple marriages are not allowed in most parts of the world.
Alcohol is allowed in most parts of the world, should we go drinking then?
Majority does not decide what is acceptable for Muslims or not.
Please don't think this man is doing his wife any favours by staying with her & concealing his intentions.
This is what I will call manipulating Islam to fit your own needs.
He is not doing her any favor, rather he is practicing is Allah given right to polygamy. He is misguided in thinking he can conceal his marriage as a secrete and that can be rectified through the imam giving him dawaah and naseeha on the matter. But I would hardly label his intentions and actions as "manipulating Islam" to "fit his needs".
It is funny how hypocrisy works in secular law. I can have multiple girlfriends and they can all know of one another and find it perfectly fine me using them only for my desires, but when it comes to multiple wives and responsibility for those wives and given them their rights, that suddenly is not permitted.
I agree.
Actually there are three kinds of polygamy practiced in Western societies:
Serial polygamy, that is, marriage, divorce, marriage, divorce and so on any number of times.
A man married to one woman but having and supporting one or more mistresses.
An unmarried man having a number of mistresses.
In her book The Life and Teachings of Muhammed, Dr. Annie Besant says:
“There is pretended monogamy in the West, but in reality, there is polygamy without responsibility; the mistress is cast off when the man is weary of her ... the first lover has no responsibility for her future, and she is a hundred times worst off then the sheltered wife in a polygamous home.”
“When we see thousands of miserable women who crowd the streets of Western towns during the night, we must surely feel that it does not lie in the Western mouth to reproach Islam for polygamy. It is better for woman, happier for woman, more respectable for woman to live in polygamy, united to one man, only with a legitimate child in her arms and surrounded with respect, than to be seduced and then cast out into the streets, perhaps with illegitimate child outside the rule of law, uncared, unsheltered, to become victim of any passer-by, night after night, rendered incapable of motherhood, despised by all.”
. This is logic. It could be off course that I have missed something according to logic, that says something else. Allah knows best.
!!??? :Emoji7::Emoji7::Emoji7::Emoji7: